PROOFREAD MY ESSAY PLEASE!!!

I just ask some of y'all to read this essay and tell me what to fix. The read should not be long and will link it below. Please provide useful commentary applies to the essay. I will give brainleist to the answers that are the most helpful. For reference, I am a sophomore and this is my argumentative essay. Thank You So Much!

PROOFREAD MY ESSAY PLEASEI just ask some of yall to read this essay and tell me what to fix The read should not be long and will link it below Please provide us class=
PROOFREAD MY ESSAY PLEASEI just ask some of yall to read this essay and tell me what to fix The read should not be long and will link it below Please provide us class=
PROOFREAD MY ESSAY PLEASEI just ask some of yall to read this essay and tell me what to fix The read should not be long and will link it below Please provide us class=
PROOFREAD MY ESSAY PLEASEI just ask some of yall to read this essay and tell me what to fix The read should not be long and will link it below Please provide us class=